1. |
Deaf Parrot
05:05
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Dear Rudiff,
I’m writing ‘cause I think I got a whole lot of nothing in my mind
And it’s starting to consume me
The blank page taking over the sketch
I regret to inform you that there ain’t much left of me
But still, I hope that you can vouch for me
When I’m gone, I wanna’ be remembered for all that I am
Not the good, not the bad—just the middle
-In between the fence of right and wrong
A fine rope strapped to one edge of the cliff
And the other is a riddle taking form of a noose around my broke neck
A sick head kicked bad from the mirror man
Still hanging in my office where you left it—never clearer, man
But that person staring back is rude
-Telling me lies all the time, and I’m closer to believing him
So I hope you’re closer to retrieving him
See, I was under the impression you was’ just taking a break
Made mistakes that you wanted to repent for
And I was all for that repentance,
But now it’s been so long that I think you might be running towards an exit
And if that’s true, it’s not on accident...
It’s been a while, you’ve been giving me the shoulder
I’m waiting for this whole dang thing to blow over
I wrote you three or four times
And I checked, but you never hit me back
-Just assumed you too had been consumed by the pollen of the bloom
But I know you better than that
I check twice a day, ‘cause I know you better than that
Don’t mean to scuff up your shoes or scratch upon your new ride
Where black and white once were just gray lines,
Is now a mess of paint and strange ink blots
Shaped like plastic soldiers
And we’re older, so the whole world’s looking mighty colder
-A bold move
Yes sir, I remember the old rule
“Never meddle with affairs outside your own room”
But I just can’t help myself, man
It’s not Tru!
All the stuff that they been saying about you
It’s got me seeing red, I’m the bull—I’m the monsoon
I want you to understand that I never once thought a single word had any merit
I kept myself perched up high—deaf parrot
Staring at that billygoat reflection
The mirror that you gave me’s like a spreading infection
Refracting what I want to see, but that ain’t me
What’s the guarantee if I return it to you that I will be free of this curse?
Getting harder not to hurt myself with each and every verse
-No virtue
Don’t mean to alert you,
But if I’ve gotta’ keep on looking, might desert you
I’m like a cartoon living in the same reruns that been showing for the last ten years
Where you at?
Could you take a fucking second just to hit me back?
Dear Rudiff,
You know I get covert sometimes
And that’s work tryna’ flirt with the murk of life
But we was equals… I never meant to diss you
I never meant to turn it all around—that’s not the issue
I miss you
You left this thing with me because you thought that I could handle it
I guess you thought wrong
I’m a walking bomb, ticking wicked clicks
Just a thought and it’s all gone
Quick tip: never put your faith in my agenda
We both know that I do not care where I could end up
I don’t know when this negative flow started
Pent up aggression leaking from my naked fists
I am the center, I’m the beast
The puzzle piece missing
-Lodged under the cushion of the couch
Sucked up by the vacuum cleaner hose and thrown out three towns away
So there’s a hole now
How you hang that up to show and still be proud about it?
I’m writing ‘cause I think a whole lot of nothing
And my blood’s running black
There ain’t no coming back
It’d be nice to hear your voice once more before it’s over
But I’ma do what I’ma do, I’m sure you know that
I guess I just want your approval
-Tru
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2. |
Drought
04:51
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Dear Rudiff,
I’m a clown in town—not turning people’s heads
On the prowl, I’m weaving like a thread
About time that someone end up dead…
But instead, I keep my posture, keep my cool
Keeping simple, keep it loose
Got my hands all in my pockets—my gesture for truce
Just like you taught me,
I know how to blend in even though I do not fit in
It’s a costume—only pretend
In the end, it gets the job done
And these people think I’m one of them
They treat me like another splash of gray atop this palette of paint
Understand I do this ‘cause sometimes I feel trapped
Being alone under the city starts to make me retract my claws
So I gotta’ get out to keep them sharp and alert
It’s like flirting with the victim you about to make still and inert
And it’s worth it, you know?
Kinda’ gives me a purpose, you know?
If it was not for this monthly stroll,
I’d start to feel a bit worthless, you know?
And I’d hurt myself—desert myself
Give birth to the extrovert
That has been lurking and jerking these strings inside of my noggin
This world is drying up with one possible outcome
-To put a hole inside my head
Forty seasons—going on more
Cannot remember the last time we spoke
I got urges for insurgence
And words stuck in the back of my throat
Choke ‘em down with a glass of mocha
Oh my god, it’s hard to stay low-profile
I think it’s time that we both try to meet up
Agree at a place I can see ya’
I been writing, you been working?
I figured as much, since I haven’t got a letter back
My mom tried to say that you a “fair-weather friend”
But fuck that bitch, barely got it together, man
She wasn’t there! We was out in the cold—in the trenches
You kept me alive, that’s real friendship!
All she ever did was eat up my pension
When I talk, bitch don’t even pay attention
But you do, that’s why I keep writing
Yesterday, I guess was alright
This nigga tried to drop me in the alley
That shit that you taught me has started to rake up a tally
I got a talent for blood
But remorse keeps nipping at my ear
Feeling bad for these faces
Hope the feds can’t trace this…
You’s the one who told me to embrace this
I’ll be honest, I’m feeling alone
Like, gimmie’ a sign, man—throw me or bone or something
Every day is a struggle
That mirror you gave me is nothing but trouble
Another dime, another a day
Back to back—a domino, I sway
I’m starting to mind, if I’m taking your time away
Just let me know, and I’ll cut with the bullshit!
And if not, then I don’t mean to push
I know you a busy man, no need to rush
If I’m talking too much, I can shush
All these emotions—I’m tryna’ flush it out or crush it
How long until a man fully drop down
Before he hit bottom?
-Before I hit bottom
This world is drying up with one possible outcome
-To put a hole inside my head
I think I’ve had enough, and I’m ready for no more
Let’s put a hole inside this head
I was feeling good in the moment
Thought if I owned up to it, I’d show my true colors
Just tryna’ be honest
I’m like a comet, leaving a trail of blood behind me
Hey Rudiff…
Do you remember that time we picked up that slut on the side of the road?
And she tried to do us both, but you wasn’t having that—no
You wrapped some barbed wire ‘round her throat
And you pulled, and she couldn’t scream
She was choking… that was the first time I saw someone croaking
Back then, I was real soft-spoken
I guess I’ve changed a lot
And the doctor says not to strain, but ah!
I’m in pain!
I’m not going back to that place!
She can’t fucking help me, she just keeps on playing it safe!
‘Cause she’s afraid to dig down deep where my real issues sleep
Down with the shit and the sulfur and tar
Down where my real demons are
She just pumps me full of meds
And hopes that I’ll be docile ‘til I’m dead
Hope’s I’ll feel awesome ‘til I’m obviously so fucked up
I can’t possibly hurt no one no more!
Well, she was wrong, Rudiff…
This world is drying up with one possible outcome
-To put a hole inside my head
I think I’ve had enough, and I’m ready for no more
Let’s put a hole inside this head
-Tru
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3. |
Trophy Case
04:40
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PRILLY T: Aye bro, is that your car?
MAN: Yea.
PRILLY T: Well, can you move it?
This is where I usually park, thanks.
Shit… why am I here again?
I don’t even know, I hate this place.
Is this your first time?
MAN: What’s your problem?
PRILLY T: My problem? Umm…
I got a call from my shrink,
She said she think it be time for a checkup
I told her no more medication
That’s how she keep me in inviso-fucking handcuffs
Get down to real deep shit
Bitch, you better man-up!
I said I’m not going back,
But she be pulling like crack rock
Attack dog—I turn into if I don’t listen
I got a creature in me, and he been sneaking around
Saying things, doing things you would probably frown upon, bro
MAN: You’re crazy, man.
PRILLY T: What, you think I’d make that up?
MAN: Yea.
PRILLY T: Nigga, fuck you. I got real problems.
MAN: Whatever you say, man.
PRILLY T: You’re my biggest one, right now.
You and this nasty elevator.
This elevator smell like piss and smoke
You’d think they’d keep it clean,
Lest they wanna go and trigger someone
Last time I’s here, I heard they had a situation
One of the doctors had been fucking with his patients
I know, it’s messed up!
Like, how you get your license and shit?
You’d think they’d have a test for that
And we’re the stupid ones?
Shit, all these doctors, bro, they be on the same boat
They helping us to help themselves not to knife their own throats
Ice cold—I’m told, but they on a different level
A flip switch—clicked
She said it hit like a rebel
Revel in animus
An animal standing this close to the glass will crack
And that’s why I’m a stupid one
BARBARA; Hey, Prilly.
PRILLY T: Hey, Barbara.
BARBARA: How are you?
PRILLY T: I been pretty great.
BARBARA: I’ve been calling you.
PRILLY T: I know I haven’t picked up my phone—I been a’ flaking…
BARBARA: Are you avoiding me?
PRILLY T: I’m not avoiding you. I just got more important shit to do
BARBARA: Like what?
PRILLY T: I don’t know, like… shit?
Still writing Rudiff, yea
Naw, he hasn’t wrote me back
He’s a busy fucking dude!
Ain’t got time for my bitching and complaining
Entertaining as it is,
I’m like a fucking cloud puking problems on his head
Completely understandable, the nigga wants to bathe in some sun
Let go? Bitch, I’ve excommunicated like… everyone
I write to Rudiff ‘cause he understands
He was there!
You was sitting in your comfy doctor chair
Eating snacks, tryna’ crack people’s heads
If I told you half the shit that I thought, you’d probably end up dead
I don’t want your medication, bitch
Do your fucking job!
I don’t wanna be a zombie, I just wanna feel normal again
Ice cold—I’m told, but they on a different level
A flip switch—clicked
She said it hit like a rebel
Revel in animus
An animal standing this close to the glass will crack
And that’s why I’m a stupid one
We can’t let of our problems, they made their home
We like to hold ‘em like a trophy
-Keep ‘em close to our hearts
Makes me feel special
Knowing nobody else has seen what I’ve seen
And that’s why I’m a stupid one
I could take you down deeper...
I could be the escort...
But when that darkness gets thicker, don’t call mission abort
I’m sorry, but if you really wanna’ help me
You’ll try to tag along
So take a breath, we going under...
When I was seven years old, I took a slingshot
And killed a baby robin—shot a toad with a pellet gun
It’s not that weird, children do that all the time
What makes me different is I kept the bodies in my pillowcase...
I thought the smell they made was soothing
And Rudiff? He lived right down the street
He was also into killing helpless animals
And people start to notice when their pets is going missing
That’s when we started up the fishing
See, people throw a fit
When Mr. Fluffles has his fucking head ripped off
But no one cares when you cut up a fish,
Rip out its guts, stomp it, smash on it tree
Yo, Rudiff took a bite and had the gills between his teeth
But it wasn’t enough
When I was just seventeen,
We found this hooker, and we picked her up off of the street
He strangled her, and sawed her head off with a butter knife
Then he stuck his dick inside her throat hole and climaxed
And me? I watched it like a fucking imax
I was so impressed!
Thinking, “Man… I need to try that shit!”
That’s why I write him, fuck!
Got me excited!
Nobody has the bond that we have
Nigga, we brothers for life
Ice cold—I’m told, but they on a different level
A flip switch—clicked
She said it hit like a rebel
Revel in animus
An animal standing this close to the glass will crack
And that’s why I’m a stupid one
We can’t let of our problems, they made their home
We like to hold ‘em like a trophy
-Keep ‘em close to our hearts
Makes me feel special
Knowing nobody else has seen what I’ve seen
And that’s why I’m a stupid one
Hey, guess who’s getting fucked up tonight?
Fucking bitch
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4. |
Washing Machines
04:34
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For real, this Renekton shit is awesome!
I- I feel like I’m seeing the whole world in a bunch of different colors
Bunch of different… colors
Umm… And I stall
Dear Rudiff,
I pre-drank my fall
Guess what?
The cost of a lesson learned is not always forgiven,
But I’ve driven passed the point of no return
Can’t see me running out of words,
And sure, I could probably even sketch you something
It’s a regret every time I see this salt-water reflection
Looking pale, I guess I misplaced the directions to my soul
Ha,results of insurrection
But I wish you’d seen it when I marched into that room
"What's howlin', ladies and gentlemen?
Welcome to my Christmas!
Watch me separate these shifting fingers from this fist-less paw”
Then they all jumped up to resist me,
But distance was too far-
Oh! And I tried to move the bottom of the sea
-Couldn’t get a grip
This one’s kinda’ hard to explain…
But I mean… between you and me, I wasn’t seeing things straight
That shit she put me on was not agreeing with me
I’m still feeling a tinsy bit out there...
And it’s hard to get close now, for me
‘Cause some people just seem like washing machines
I was at the laundromat hoping you’d hit me back
So to kill some time, I try to unwind by talking up this cat
He had this interesting padlock on a belt, and a mohawk
-I don’t really affiliate with people like that
But goddamn, this guy was so cool!
Free-throws with his laundry just like he was swishing hoops
-Got that plaid interior inside his combat boots
Stomped across the aisle like he was shooting up a school
I said, “Dude! You’ve got to meet my buddy, Rudiff!
The next time he’s in town, I will be sure to introduce you to him”
Gave me nod of respect, and then went on with the rest of his set
I regret even talking to him
See, I don’t put myself out there
Just ‘cause people only pout and bitch about shit
I wish I gave a fuck
Went into my trunk to get a bucket
He kinda’ pissed me off, I wanna’ slice open his stomach
Make him watch as he bleeds out
And laugh as he freaks out
How funny would it be in this scene
To watch his bowels explode in the shape of a <3
Is it just me, or are people not that friendly anymore?
And it’s hard to get close now, for me
‘Cause some people just seem like washing machines
Makes me sick to the bone to believe
There are people who settle for being washing machines
Long story short, it was time for a reckoning
I beckoned him over, prepared to full-force wrecking ball his face
His eyes went wide, the time was nigh!
“And now, you die-” Wait!
But then he started sweet talking
“Weren’t you the guy that broke into that corporate office with the cat?
And you tried to makes its fingers disappear—just like that!
Yo, I heard you got arrested…”
I said, “It was just magic, but I guess they weren’t impressed with it”
Then we talked it up for like an hour or two
Uhh… I guess he is my friend (but he’s got nothing on you)
The point I’m trying to make
Is that this person (give or take) was really great
And I guess I kinda’ learned something
Some people seem like they’re useless ‘til you give them a use
Like, what’s a washing machine if there’s no laundry to do?
I’m pondering truth while I am writing to you
Because honestly,
I can’t be open about this with anyone else
-Tru
And it’s hard to get close now, for me
‘Cause some people just seem like washing machines
Makes me sick to the bone to believe
There are people who settle for being washing machines
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5. |
Apathy Dose
03:59
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Yo, I gotta’ turn this click-track down
This shit’s too loud
Oh, I forgot the words to the song… Umm
Dear Rudiff,
The alarm went off, I let it ring
I don’t even wanna get up to see this world
Don’t wanna try—subject to all these thoughts of suicide
And I wanna die, but I can’t ‘cause I owe you my life
And that’s fine
I guess it flies, so I’ma do this one more time
Feels like I’ma throw up
Aye bro, what’s the hold up?
Waiting on your approval,
But I know that shit won’t show up
Can’t find the motivation to even get up out my bedroom
Looks like the sky ain’t falling, but I been struggling for headroom
I’m back on medication
They don’t want me going apeshit—uh
The doctor said it’s not my fault I’m trapped in palliation
But unless she wanna throw me a more permanent solution
I’ma need to find a real way to sift through this dilution, bruh
Ah—I been puking lightning bolts
These pills is gold, nigga
Ah—I fucking hate this world
On the floor, lying in my own drool
And I’m just about ready to slice open my motherfucking stomach
It hurts to feel it merge into my body
But it suppresses all the urges of this sociopathic mind
The doctor says I’m doing fine—so fine
But I’m not…
I’m living in a dome inside my head,
And I’m fucked
I’m not talking to my mother
I’m not talking to my pa
I stopped talking to pretty much everyone but you, man
-Here’s applause
I keep looking up to sky,
Surprised it still hangs there
After all the bullshit that we been through?
You would think that shit would fall
But it’s clinging like a spider clings
-The proof of room for lighter days
I might just make it through all of this fluid coming out my fucking mouth
Ah—I been puking lightning bolts
These pills is gold, nigga
Ah—I fucking hate this world
I can see the gravedigger watching over me
Black-holing me,
And showing me ways to take control of the creature that’s inside me
But who else to confide in?
You never hit me back,
So this voice is like my best fucking friend
Call it counter-productive
But fuck it
These pills don’t make the voices shutup
They still be talking—just at a lower level
Got me feeling all dishevelled and shit
That’s a big word for someone as retarded as me
It’s like a party in my body, and they kicking me out
I’m feeling naughty, but my shawty, she done peaced the fuck out
Because I stabbed her in the throat with a ballpoint pen
Shit… I need to take my pills again
-Tru
Ah—I been puking lightning bolts
These pills is gold, nigga
Ah—I fucking hate this world
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6. |
Pulse
04:12
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Dear Rudiff,
You know, I’m thinking that I’ve had enough secrets
I been open-handed, and I got nothing to lose
But what’s left to gain?
Is it worth all that shame?
In this world, I feel intangible, not tethered to reality
Brushing your mirror ‘cause it’s taking my place right here for now
It’s glinting so clear, every star I see is full
How churlish of me not to ask permission…
Been preoccupied with wishing that Earth would take existence from me
I’m hardly outside my head anymore
Still waiting on your approval
More times than I realized,
I was left unfinished—diminished
I still don’t get it yet
‘Cause I give my everything,
But it seems even you don’t have my back...
And I’m left in the corner, pushing harder—a martyr!
-The promised fracture
No, I shouldn’t step forward
I done lost all of my nerve
Before my innocence splintered
And then blew away, I was dreaming better days
But no, that’s something I cannot relate to
No pain—can’t feel anyway
My turn to escape was a rat, and it’s been displaced
I bent this way ‘cause you’re the only person I can trust!
I’m hardly outside my head anymore
Still waiting on your approval
Well here I go, writing letters to ghosts
I just don’t understand, where have you been?
Now, I planned the way this will shoot
Flirt with a lie, man—that’s what I do
If I can see it, then I can fear it
And if I owned it, I could just tear it down
Instead of staring me down,
Why don’t you help me by clearing this out?
If I can’t see, then I won’t fear it
I always thought you would be here for me
It’d be nice to finally hear a friendly voice just like my own
I shouldn’t be ashamed...
A life—a pulse, what more could I ask for?
Maybe I’m just feeling aged
Maybe I’m just lonely
-Tru
Innocence splintered and then blew away
I was dreaming better days,
But it seems even you didn’t have my back
I’m hardly outside my head anymore
Still waiting on your approval
And here I go, writing letters to ghosts
I just don’t understand where you have been
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7. |
Response
05:24
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Dear Rudiff,
I wish I listened to you when we was on top,
Back when we was still soldiers
Iraq felt quick, we let that slip
And you was right, man… things have never been the same
Since we last spoke, I have been struggling
I guess it kinda’ bugs me that you just stopped responding
But the other day, I got this letter…
It was addressed from you to me,
And I thought it’d get better
I didn’t open it at first, no
I kept it on my kitchen floor, walked around it real slow
Just had to soak it all up
The fact you finally got back…
I was unsure of myself
Alluring it felt to sit and watch
Waiting to see if it would just start to open itself
I was afraid, man
We haven’t spoken in ten years and sixteen days, man
I been counting…
“I don’t advocate it
Tru, you go do what you got to do
If you feel you’re so alone”
I don’t know what to think…
Like, what the fuck you tryna’ say?
That if I offed myself, you would not give a shit either way?
I guess I’m confused, I feel used
Like, what the fuck am I supposed to do?
I was expecting more from you, Rudiff
Put up a fight or something
This isn’t right...
There’s nothing in those empty words!
You just dismissed me!
You’re acting like you won’t miss me
Man, all you did here was diss me…
I’m hurting
“I don’t advocate it
Tru, you go do what you got to do
If you feel you’re so alone”
Dear Rudiff,
This will be the last time that I write you
If there’s one thing that I’ve learned, it’s that I’m not like you
Different people, different strings, all that
I guess it doesn’t matter, but aye, don’t try to write me back
I would not want you to waste the stamp
I won’t be around, so that shit just get returned to you
Anyway, thanks for finally getting back
-Tru
P.S.
Asshole
“I don’t advocate it
Tru, you go do what you got to do
If you feel you’re so alone”
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8. |
Silver Lining
07:00
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PRILLY T: Fuck off!
MAN: Hey, what happened?
MAN: Hello, hello, hello, hello!
PRILLY T: Yo! Fucking weirdo…
BARBARA: Prilly?
PRILLY T: Hey, Barbara.
BARBARA: Wait, what are… Is it raining outside?
PRILLY T: Yea, it’s raining outside. That’s why I’m soaked.
BARBARA: Are you crying?
PRILLY T: No... I’m not crying.
BARBARA: Well, why is your face wet?
PRILLY T: I just told you! It’s raining…
BARBARA: Well, how did you get here?
PRILLY T: I walked here.
BARBARA: Well, why didn’t you take a cab?
PRILLY T: I just wasn’t feeling a cab.
Didn’t want the whole human exchange... thing.
BARBARA: Prilly, you know you don’t have an appoint until spring-
PRILLY T: I know I don’t have an appointment until the spring.
There’s just a lot of shit that I need to speak.
So can you listen?
BARBARA: Uhh… I’m kind of swamped.
PRILLY T: I insist. Can you do your job?
For like once?
BARBARA: Okay…
PRILLY T: Thank you.
I finally got a response back from Rudiff
BARBARA: Oh?
PRILLY T: He pretty much told me to go get lost
BARBARA: I’m sorry, how do you feel?
PRILLY T: It’s like a fire inside of me
Has suddenly turned to an ash
I’m trying to look on the brighter side of things,
But all I feel is alone
How can a person that you idolized
Not be the person that you thought?
There’s so many twists and little turny roads
And I guess I just don’t know where to cross
But I’ve seen the other side
And it’s got me feeling down
I figured, why should I end my life,
When another me’s crawling about?
I don’t get it, and that’s too bad
I’m all thumbs now—not going back
What I’m feeling is not okay
O’ I’m suffering, and you’re to blame!
BARBARA: Okay, you need to calm down.
You’re being violent.
PRILLY T: I’m not being violent! I’m just… excited I guess.
‘Lotta feelings. ‘Lotta prickly little feelings
BARBARA: Okay, can you describe me these feelings?
PRILLY T: It’s kinda’ like… like being inside an enormous wasp nest.
And they’re all like… really, really upset that I’m there.
BARBARA: Well, have you been taking your medication?
PRILLY T:I stopped taking my medication.
BARBARA: When?
PRILLY T: I don’t know, like two weeks ago…
BARBARA: Prilly, you can’t be off your medication.
PRILLY T: I know, but it makes me feel all fucked up.
And I’m already all fucked up,
So it just kinda’ like… double-fucks me.
BARBARA: Prilly-
PRILLY T: Barbara, I don’t wanna’ be double-fucked.
O’ this foundation inside of me,
Just got the most miniscule crack!
And all the tarry, gooey shit that surrounds
Is starting to ooze on in
It’s funny how this all worked out
I’m stunned I couldn’t see
All of its buried right under the ground that I stand on
And I never thought to dig…
Bitch, what is in that box on the table?
BARBARA: It’s nothing. Tell me more about this ground-
PRILLY T: Woah, woah, hold on, hold on.
Lemme’ see that.
BARBARA: I don’t think that’s a good idea-
PRILLY T: Bitch, lemme’ see it!
BARBARA: Prilly, I…
PRILLY T: These are my letters...
BARBAR: I can… I can-
PRILLY T: These are my letters to Rudiff…
BARBARA: There’s- There’s a perfectly logical-
PRILLY T: How did you get these...?
I don’t get it, and that’s too bad
I’m all thumbs now—not going back
What I’m feeling is not okay
O’ I’m suffering, and you’re to blame!
Okay, you got… You got ten seconds to explain yourself
BARBARA: Why don’t we just-
PRILLY T: No, don’t- Don’t look at the door.
Don’t look at the door.
The door doesn’t have the answers, bitch!
Look at me. Look at me!
BARBARA: Prilly, wh-
PRILLY T: Why do you have these?
BARBARA: I...
PRILLY T: Why the fuck do you have these?!?
BARBARA: I-
PRILLY T: Is he your patient too?
BARBARA: No-
PRILLY T: Answer me, you fucking whore!
Why the fuck do you have my-
Oh, you’re gonna’ cry?
You’re gonna cry?
Ahuuhuuhuu
Aaaahuhuhu, I’m crying too, bitch!
I’m crying too, bitch!
BARBARA: It was Rudiff!!
PRILLY T: Wh- Th-this was his idea-
What are you two together?
You’re lying.
You’re lying!
You’re- you’re a fucking liar!
Aaaahhh!
O’ don’t even try it, you’re dead bitch!
C’mere! What is that? Oh, a pencil sharpener!
A brand new pencil sharpener!
You know, lemme’ borrow it so I can use it to fuck you up!
Yea, you like that?
Aww, look at this!
Look at this, you got some brand new holes!
Some brand new holes to join the other ones!
Who’s in whose head now, bitch?!?
No, don’t- don’t- No, no, no!
Don’t die yet, don’t die yet!
I mean look around, we’ve got this great office
With sooo many wonderful toys!
Oh, lemme’ just grab this stapler,
So I can staple your fucking eyelids shut!
Read my tells now, I dare you!
And you’re next, Rudiff!
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9. |
Gutter
05:16
|
|
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Dear… Rudiff,
Nah, that’s not good enough.
That’s not good enough.
Dear...
Dear bitch,
I guess I changed my mind
It’d be anti-climactic to drop this on a good line
I been thinking a lot ‘bout what you said to me
And the more I thought, the more you end up dead to me
Your words pricked like a viper’s bite
I might suck out that venom just to use it for spite
Uh—that’s why I write this
-To let you know I’m coming for you
You got another place to stay?
Because I’m gunning for you
Running all the way…
I’ll be there in a day or two...
I’m not your friend,
So I don’t know who the fuck is praying for you
I’m not delaying, I’m just giving fair-warning
Got one chance to leave before I show up and start goring
Dig—boring my nails through your cheeks
And pull out your teeth with the bent end of a tire-iron
No need for pliers—too quick and too painless
Was gonna drop a chorus, but don’t even wanna sing that shit
I just wanna string you up
I wanna push weights on your legs and bust your kneecaps out
Shove needles in your pupils,
And drag ‘em ‘round the iris
Get that disinfectant ‘cause I don’t want you to die yet
Blood and bile as you puke up worms
Lap it in a glass and make you drink your own vomit
Prilly Tru be telling it, I hope I didn’t stutter
Dreaming up your funeral while I throw you in the gutter, cunt
I been crafting up and scheming
And thinking of all the many ways that I could stop you from blinking
Man, you gonna’ see the full show!
And I’m counting down the hours and minutes before it’s air-time
Ahh, you hear that?
The sound of your cries,
As I’m burning off your cuticles with a soldering iron
And I don’t mean to be critical, I’m kinda’ analytical
Admit I’m going too fucking far
But I been off my meds for three fucking weeks
Man, this feels great!
For the first time in a while, I can finally fucking think
My shrink’s been telling me to stay on ‘em
‘Cause she can’t do her fucking job,
She said it’s not her problem
The trauma you gon’ go through
When I show you pictures of her
But you the main course, call that bitch an early dessert
I’m being literal, I’m really gonna’ eat ya’
Rip out your esophagus and wolf it like a pizza
I just wanna bleed you dry
Bloat your fucking body, fly you like a kite
I’m in your skin
I’ll slip my tongue into all the little muscles and fibers
-Loosely holding you together
Blood and bile as you puke up worms
Lap it in a glass and make you drink your own snot
Prilly Tru be telling it, I hope I didn’t stutter
Dreaming up your funeral while I throw you in the gutter, bitch
Hey, I’m being saved now
There’s a warm, bright light creeping ‘round my ankles
It means there’s still a chance to rise to Heaven
Forgive and forget and never regret
And as iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens man
-Proverbs 27:17
I understand now
I have been changed—my soul has been lifted
Because of you, man… all pain done shifted
Sike!
What you think, I believe all that?
Ain’t no “God” gon’ stop this fucking demon attack
Ain’t no Heaven for you, ain’t no Hell for me
When you die, you gon’ end up on a dirty fucking street corner
Where I drop the trash bag with your body parts shoved in it
You end up in the sewer when I vomit you out
‘Cause I can’t properly digest your fucking bone marrow
And once you’re dead, I’ma break and fuck the glass of your mirror too
I’m only rolling in one nigga deep
I don’t mean to preach, but I’ma wake you from your sleep
And rape your faggot ass with a pitchfork
Just one time, so I can live it back and masturbate to it
Blood and bile as you puke up sperm
Slap it on a plate and make you eat your own shit, bitch
Prilly Tru be telling it, I hope I didn’t stutter
Dreaming up a funeral while I throw you in the gutter, motherfucker
-Tru
|
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10. |
Hallowed
05:34
|
|
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PRILLY T: Hey, Rudiff.
I brought your mirror,
But I got some shit that I gotta say to you first,
And umm… I can’t have you walking away from me
So…
[shotgun blast]
RUDIFF: Ahh! What the fuck, bro?
PRILLY T: Shutup. Umm...
Ice cold—I’m told, but you’re on a different level
I flip switch—clicked
Shouldn’t this hit like a rebel?
Revel in animus
You’re an animal
Standing this close to the glass,
Shouldn’t it crack?
Wouldn’t know, I wasn’t stupid enough
And that’s the issue, I been doing this for years
Wrong side of the track, so no one’s getting anywhere
-Stare like train is coming
Called my fiction too fast,
Then “forgot” all my letters ‘cause I put you on blast?
Look at you act surprised!
Like you would never strike the ground with your fist
And crumble under pressure
As for punishment?
Oh… let’s let “God” decide whose reality is flawed
...like He gon’ talk shit
I keep my head pointed up incase this stratus clears up
Better days—medicate like it gon’ heal your fucking problems right up
Feed on that bullshit!
I’ma keep on pushing words deeper into your skull, like a contusion
Begin to question the stressing that you done been through
Defend from these shots—act shielded and offend-proof
But don’t pretend you had never meant to leave me your baggage
Uh-oh—surprise!
I brought all back!
In fact, I tracked your lack of passion back to the “good ol’ days”
When life wasn’t tragic
Imagined the look on your face when I passed it like traffic
And it’s a bit amusing
See, ‘cause that shit was just so accurate!
It’s all immaculate—just the way that you left it
The same day that you stepped out of my life
And told me it didn’t matter
I couldn’t shatter this mirror ‘cause I knew you was near
You left a hole, I’ll fill it up with your crocodile tears, bitch
In my heart there’s no violence
You were dead-set on fishing it out
Like a shadow in darkness,
Kept the truth buried—hidden
And I am the shovel that’s digging it up
No, your ground-
Your ground wasn’t hallowed enough
Say it’s not my problem
Say it’s not my fault
Say you’re gonna’ make some time for changes after all
Say you’re gonna’ accomplish things
Say you understand
We both know that’s bullshit
We both know you can’t
Nigga, fuck you!
Throw that in your system of files
I can’t talk to you anymore
I don’t know—it could end up archived
And that’s fine… but get no respect from me
Build up your collection!
I poured my goddamned soul out
But apparently, I’m just another project to you
In my heart there’s no violence
You were dead-set on fishing it out
Like a shadow in darkness,
Kept the truth buried—hidden
And I am the shovel that’s digging it up
No, your ground-
Your ground wasn’t hallowed enough
You couldn’t see it
How the fuck you supposed to be it?
What the fuck, you chose to be this!
Now you acting like you somebody else
You want my help?
Oh, where were you when I was you?
It’s like that
I wrote you a thousand times
You told me, “Do what you gotta’ do”
And I been doing!
Once more, I’m holding true inside my soul
-Inside my mind
But it just seems like part of me’s leaking out
Corruption, doubt, resentment without a cause
Strike me down if that’s what changes y’all!
I’ll be your mirror
I’ll reflect it back at you
-A full-on psychological assault to crack you
I tracked you down to let you out
We’ll set this ground up with a solid foundation,
Then break you down
There’s no escaping how I hate you now!
You’re fake!
I can’t take looking at you!
You’s a fucking disgrace!
The shell of a man I once knew and loved…
Dig a little deeper—might just end up above it all
This bomb inside’s a ticking clock
And it’s been slickly tricking seconds of our lives away
The longer we keep sitting here debating, the more it’s all degrading
It’s entertaining
We can blow up the entire world
If that will get you to admit that you have got a fucking problem
I can’t stop it—ah!
I must be outta’ my fucking mind
But still, I dropped this
And doubt that you’ll ever get me…
All you do is upset me...
So let me be the first to say I’m digressing…
Peace, man
In my heart there’s no violence
You were dead-set on fishing it out
Like a shadow in darkness,
Kept the truth buried—hidden
And I am the shovel that’s digging it up
No, your ground-
Your ground wasn’t hallowed enough
|
Prilly T
Before anybody throws a fit about my use of the word, "Nigga," understand that I am half black. While it should not matter (because I am not using the word in a derogatory way), people are presumptuous. My biological father is 100% Jamaican, and even though I am passable as "white" I AM biracial. Getting upset by me using the word is denying the black half of my family's culture. ... more
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